i've been in love
a time or two
i've seen the world
when i'm with you
i wanna fly
and spread my wings
i don't wanna cry
i wanna sing...
i want to live
and take a chance
I'M NOT AFRAID
TO LOVE AGAIN...
i wanna fall
fall for you...
AND I WANT YOU
TO FALL FOR ME TOO...


*******

pathetic song, ain't it. ultimate cheese. but it just stuck. and yes, i really wanted you to fall for me too.

i went out so i could forget. i went out cos i wanted to get distracted. it did, at some point. but everything just reminds me of you. it's a conspiracy. the video playing on the monitor when we got in. the k-hon. the vocalist... for a moment there i thought he was you.

the past week had just been my worst. you know the calm before the storm? that was two weeks ago. and now im in the eye of the tornado and there's no way out. how i got into this situation, is totally my fault.

it would've been really easier if you were a jerkwad, an asscrack, or if i just plain hate your guts. but no. you had to be the nicest boy, the cutest one at that... the good son... the ever reliable friend. it's not your fault that i had to like you. you prolly don't even have the slightest idea that i do.

i've always hated, nay, despised this feeling. cos everytime i feel this way, i know pain's next... that's for sure. but i still gave in. yeah. stupid me gave in.

in my attempt to cover up how im feeling, it made me more sad and mad at myself for even thinking of trying. now i'm screwed and there's no turning back.

woe is me.

:( :( :(