it's time to go home now. it's been the "greatest" day..

went hospital-hopping today and it wasn't as productive as i expected it to. i went off early this morning half-expecting to pass 3 resumes at those 3 hospitals i called up last week and checked for vacancies. well, life's definitely a bitch. turned out, only one of 'em really had a vacancy and those people i've talked with on those two effin hospitals are just quasi-humans with half-a-brain who doesn't really know what "V-A-C-A-N-C-Y" means. UGH. total waste of money, time, and energy! not to mention that these three hospitals were located at different parts of the metro.

well, the trip wasn't all that bad though. for one thing, i got to prove that i have a "sense of direction" and it's working perfectly fine. (excuse that walking trip to robinson's place from NBI though. i was with someone who doesn't have any sense of direction whatsoever. totally contradicting my vibes.) all i have were phone numbers and addresses. no idea really of how to get there. but i got to go where i needed to without getting lost... not even close to getting lost. and considering that i've been a monk, that's definitely something.

first on my list is that hospital where my friend's working. it was... er... ok. i was expecting hotel-ish lobbies, bright lights, sparkly lil people, fluent english-speaking guards, you know. i was kindov thinking "rich man's hospital". considering that most of their clients are chinoys and well, most chinoys are rich. shallow eh? you get my drift.

this is quite a silly thing to say but after passing through the gate, i got scared. like "scared-out-of-my-wits" scared. don't get me wrong. i dont have any problems with our chinky-eyed friends. i actually have quite a few. but seeing them, lots of em, in one place... that's scary. it's like i've entered a whole other world without anything on me. every clinic door i passed, there's a three-lettered surname. freaky. really. i felt like an alien.

the rest of the day's been full of air pollution, traffic, and my wallet running out of cash. transpo fare's gone up like my sugar level when im pigging out on that decadent choco cake. taking the car's definitely not an option since traffic's hell and petrol prices have gone up as well. what do i hafta do to get a friggin' job around here?! ugh.

HIGHLIGHT OF THE DAY: "Leave the attitude at home. For the day of the interview, at least."

i'm a difficult, difficult kid. at least that's what my dear friends think. am i really?

emotions' hittin an all-time low. depression's as high as the petronas towers. it's slowly killing me. i know. i wouldn't be surprised if i just collapse one day and die. not that i dont want that any time soon. dying's getting to be quite a choice. considering how my life sucks right now, it's definitely a choice.

*******
if i go crazy then will you still call me SUPERMAN?